Monday, November 7, 2011

Week 10 prompt number 1 (late, I know!) sorry!

43. The pin pricks your skin. You feel nothing.

Feeling nothing is like being trapped in a box. You can't move, you don't care. I look down at my hands and it's like they aren't there. I sit there, feeling like there are bars on the windows, even if there are none. My breathing is heavy, my face is blank. 
The world feels a million miles away. The room is empty and I'm alone. 
I stand up and go to the window. The dim light streams in through the smudges and the dust. I can't see the blue in the sky or the white of the clouds. My eyes react violently to the light and i close my eyes quickly. The sun is a reminder of all things good. 
All the things I've lost now. 

3 comments:

  1. I don't think you create alienation--or the right sort anyway--by withholding essential information from the reader. Here we don't know if what's being described is the reaction to cheap drugs, a death of someone you love, a breakup with a sweetheart, an eye condition that keeps you indoors, or general existential angst.

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  2. Okay. That helps. I was really confused about alienation... So I did what came to me and waited for the feedback to see if it was wrong or not. Thank you!

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  3. Alienation is confusing, no doubt whatsoever.

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